Breaking News • GET IN MY BELLY, Hold The Onions - Jan. 15, 2025
PSA - - - If you've read this all the way through and still think Fact-Checkers are needed, just know, you should have been doing your own fact checking already. - - - you're welcome.
☆ A Hollister, Missouri man (know locally as, FAT BASTARD) was arrested for breaking into Taco Bell and drinking a full gallon of Onion Oil ☆
Due to suspicious activity police officers were dispatched to Taco Bell in Hollister at 3 A.M this morning.
When the officers arrived on scene they observed that the front glass door was shattered and broken glass was scattered throughout the entryway area.
The officers entered the building conducting a full search of the premise where they found a man asleep on the floor.
The man was surrounded by several empty containers of refried beans, ground taco meat and at least three empty bags of shredded cheese.
There was also a full gallon jug of vegetable oil that was completely empty.
The suspect was taken to Taney County jail and questioned by a detective. The suspect admitted to drinking an entire gallon of hydrogenated processed vegetable oil and eating around 5 pounds of additional food product.
He was charged with felony burglary and is currently being held with Onion breath and no bond.
PSA - - - If you've read this all the way through and still think Fact-Checkers are needed just know, you should have been doing your own fact checking already. - - - you've been Onioned, and you are welcome.